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Move into an old laundry building! In ever more clever ways to draw in those sassy downtowners, the new Yale Steam Laundry Condominiums going up at 4th Street and New York Avenue NW urge prospects to “Live Like an Icon.” (The graphic includes a va-va-voomy woman with a building on her skirt. She’s extra.) According to Webster’s, that means you could become “any of various stylized figures, as displayed on a microcomputer screen, representing available functions or resources.”

Sign me up!

And not only will you, sassy downtowners, represent available functions and resources (starting in the low 300Gs for a studio), according to an e-mail I just got from the Yale Laundry staff, you’ll also:

  • be able to play “billiards” in a glass-enclosed room!
  • be blocks away from a “New Starbucks”!
  • have access to a “New Urban Safeway” (apparently Safeway’s jumping the gun on the nickname. What? They didn’t like “Soviet Safeway: Where nothing’s on the shelf and there’s always a line?”)
  • lay claim to living in and/or near a historic building that was still a laundry until 1976!

All that and exposed brick will be yours, in the “fourth quarter of 2007.” Unless, of course, the Yalies don’t buy into that icon b.s. and the developers have turn to retail.