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Dan Snyder just acquired the entire Dick Clark video catalog. That means his theme park chain, Six Flags, can entertain patrons young and old with all the vintage American Bandstand clips they want. Snyder’s treasure chest now includes tape of lip-synchers from Buffalo Springfield to Dusty Springfield to Rick Springfield, and just about every other pop act in between.

So, given the chain’s newfound musical cache, the marketing campaign Six Flags is using to promote its 2007 summer season is amazingly lame. The TV ads being broadcast locally implore folks to come to Six Flags America in P.G. County for the “Starburst Thursday Night Concert Series,” which will feature “artists from the Jonas Brothers to Bobby Valentino.” Not that I’ve ever had my finger on the pulse of cool—-“Supper’s Ready” by Peter Gabriel-era Genesis still excites me more than anything recorded by anybody since—-but: Has anybody ever heard of the Jonas Brothers or Bobby Valentino? And that’s the cream of this year’s crop?

And for those rock snobs ready to suggest that only B-teamers play amusement parks, please look back to August 12, 1989, when Bob Dylan headlined at Six Flags’ closest rival, Kings Dominion. Steve Earle opened.