A Roundup of Morning Roundups

Never-ending war? Hi-larious! Never-ending campaign? Tee-hee-hee! Republican ass jokes? Timeless! (Wonkette)

Don’t worry! You’ll still be able to afford public transportation! Unless you’re a firefighter who ran a sex ring. Plus, crime! Also, “we” ate too much corn. (DCist)

Lonely: Pakistani opposition leaders. Lonelier: Israeli neo-Nazis. Loneliest: Tie between Ambassador to Iraq Ryan Crocker and Britney Spears’ publicist. (The Ag)

Again with the Britney Spears. (Idolator)