Big news in the corporate world today: Burger King is launching a new and healthy line of food for kids. We’re talking flame-broiled chicken tenders and something called BK Fresh Apple Fries. These are essentially apple chunks cut to resemble fries and delivered in the same packaging as fries. The apple slices will be cold and skinless.

I applaud this particular move; fries kill. And it could plant a very early cynicism in our future leaders toward packaging stunts from corporate America. Just how long do you think it’ll take youngsters to figure out they’re biting into fat-free muscle food and not one of the lushest indulgences known to mankind?

The fries are nearly 200 calories and 13 grams of fat more savory than the apple slices. Coupled with low-fat milk and the grilled chicken tenders, they’ll round out a nutritious outing for kids, starting with a 2008 launch date.

This healthful menu promises to ignite a nationwide pissing match between parents and their children, especially the ones who are old enough to appreciate BK’s heart-attack offerings. Reprogramming, say, an 8-year-old to embrace apples over fries is the parenting equivalent of moving up summer bedtime from 8 pm to 7 pm. Better luck will be had with kids just breaking into toddlerhood, who view a trip to a fast-food restaurant as a treat in itself.