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I don’t follow sports. Case in point: The other day, I spent a full minute trying to recall the name of D.C.’s NBA basketball team, and failed.* So imagine my surprise when a Metrobus ad featuring Gilbert Arenas–NBA basketball player!–managed to threaten my long-standing disinterest in sporting activites:

I don’t give a shit about basketball. But a famous basketball player lurking behind a huge, unexplained pile of powdered doughnuts? Sign me up for whatever it is you’re advertising! Further investigation reveals that I’m one of the only people in the District (and perhaps living) not privy to Gilbert Arenas’ weird awesomeness. (Turns out he’s posing with doughnuts here because he’s known for licking them, sprinking them with baby powder, and serving them to teammates).

Bring it on, Metrobus: Where’s the absurd advertising that will finally get me into baseball/hockey/football/soccer?

* It’s “The Wizards”!