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Before I signed the lease on my apartment, the property manager did not tell me that:

a) Kids from the local private school will be using the empty parking lot below my window for recess.

b) Several apartments on my floor had bed bugs.

c) I would have the pleasure of waking up every day to the sound of jackhammers.

The first two discoveries I mind. Listening to screaming kids all day while trying to type out stories is annoying. And bed bugs are scary. The news of the bed bugs has led me to scratch at phantom bug bites in the middle of the night. Nothing like waking up to the idea of bed bugs invading your futon.

But this morning takes my building up a notch. While sipping my coffee, I felt like I was waking up in Western Maryland. I heard the sound of a rooster’s squawk. There was no rooster on my block. There was just a dude imitating a rooster like he was this guy. Actually, the guy’s rooster call was pretty damn good.