I’ve been stuck in four Pope-related traffic jams over the last 18 hours — the weirdest coming this morning when I was caught behind a dirty Metro bus on P Street as a full load of MPD cops got off. And during each stuckage, I mulled over mysteries that have doubtless been mulled over at least since the last pontiff took a bullet in 1981:

Why would a Pope need mortals to protect him? Who’s really in charge here?