Get to know D.C. with our daily newsletter

We dive deep on the day’s biggest story and share links to everything you need to know.

Filmfest D.C. kicked off yesterday with a schedule full of foreign films. How fancy. But if you’re a true patriot, you might want to wait for The Second Annual GI Film Festival, to be held May 14th—-18th at the Carnegie Institution for Science.

The festival will offer screenings of such military-themed fare as The Marine and Gods and Generals along with panel discussions and VIP after-parties with filmmakers, military types, and celebrities. The festival will also include a WWE Stars Autograph Session.

But oh, the celebrities!

The festival has slated appearances from such A-listers as Gary Sinise, Robert Duvall and—-are you listening ladies?—-James Franco.

Sinise and Duvall, yeah, fine. But oh, Franco, your mild appeal knows no bounds!

James Franco, I have followed your career intermittently and with vague interest since you first caught my eye as the diamond in Judd Apatow’srough. I have since perused your IMDB profile perhaps half a dozen times, keeping abreast of your artistic achievements, from made-for-TV-biopic James Dean (oh, how you kind of resemble him!)to the upcoming Gus Van Sant vehicle Milk(ah, how you reportedly take your clothes off!)

But I must admit that while I watched with interest your performances in Spider Man 2, and, improbably, The Wicker Man, I have yet to see any of the films that might indicate why you are involved in the GI Film Festival (notably, 2006’s Annapolis). Perhaps I will catch one of your military-themed offerings during this Second Annual GI Film Festival. Perhaps I will, instead, guess wildly at what D.C. bar you might decide to frequent during the festival, and sit there, alone, until I am inevitably forced to leave.

Ah, I see that you are scheduled for a Q&A session following a screening of World War I action-adventure Flyboys on Saturday, May 17. I have but one question: James Franco, do you sometimes cut yourself on your own cheekbones?

Photo by David Shankbone.