A memo recovered from the National Press Club‘s softball team reveals the club’s top-secret strategy against the City Paper Shadows in our upcoming face-0ff this Saturday:

We’re tied for first place in our division with Team Video and Atlantic Video, and if we can win all three games, we’ll be in great shape both divisionwise and playoff wise. I’m hoping to open an early lead against City Paper and then use that game to give lots of playing time to everyone who will get short shrift in the first two games.

Early lead—-hah! How did that early lead work out for you last time? (The time after you beat us 18-5?) Oh, I remember—-God pwned you. You scored a mere 13 runs in the first inning before He totally smote you with a storm of Biblical proportions!

Go ahead, NPC. Test Him again. Don’t mind us—-we’ll just be chasing after your home run balls in the bushes behind left field.

Photo by Express‘ Holly J. Morris