I honestly can’t believe it’s taken City Desk this long to write about Bob Novak‘s accident yesterday. But, since no one has jumped at this opportunity, I suppose I will.

Let’s recap: yesterday Bob Novak, political columnist for more than 50 years, hit a pedestrian and continued driving. Afterward, a bicyclist, who witnessed the entire episode, caught up with Novak, and VERY, VERY BRAVELY, “came to a stop in front of [Novak’s] corvette,” according to the Post’s account. The man, David Bono, 47, a lawyer, started yelling at Novak about what he’d done. Wuhhh? I didn’t know I hit anyone, said Novak, essentially. The Post later asked Bono about the veracity of Novak’s claim:

“No, I would not believe that,” Bono responded.

Bono, 47, a partner at Harkins Cunningham law firm, said: “I can tell you what I saw. I was on K Street on my bicycle, and what I saw was a guy get hit by a black Corvette convertible. I see the guy go up on the hood, up on the windshield.” As the Corvette turned right from 18th Street onto the service road beside K, Bono said, “the guy rolled off the hood and landed on the street.”

Well, this is just sad, and Novak’s response is even sadder. If you watch the footage of him being grilled by reporters about the incident, he just plays dumb.

He was cited for failing to yield. Later, a News 8 reporter caught up with him:

Can you tell us what happened this morning?

“I don’t really know. I didn’t know I hit anyone.”

And later: How do you feel about this?

“I feel terrible.”

Since I still had my Worst-Case Scenario Almanac: Politics book handy, I decided to evaluate Novak’s performance, judged by some of the pointers from the “How to Survive Being Grilled By a Reporter” page.

  • Breathe. Novak’s breathing patterns are barely noticeable. Not a huff or a puff. (10 out of 10)
  • Watch your body language. Novak looks at the reporter, speaks directly into the microphone, responds to questions with total nonchalance. It’s as if the reporter is asking: “And who are you wearing today, Bob?” (10)
  • Watch Your Speech Again, slow and steady wins the race. (10)
  • Praise the Question Novak doesn’t do this once. But, he’s probably just staying in character. So, he gets points anyway. (5)

Maybe, Novak, 77, would have cracked if the reporter asked this question: Do you think you’re too old to drive, if you didn’t even notice a man sliding across your windshield?