We know D.C. Get our free newsletter to stay in the know.

Upset the Setup is upset about the setup even one Red Bull gives him. Too bad the bro boost makes your blood go sticky, a condition not unlike that of stroke victims. But thanks, Mom, for letting us know!

The AP, via WTOP, reports the inevitable: The Phelpstival. He’s coming home! He’s coming home! The greatest human being alive is coming home!

In other Olympics news, 18-year-old all-around champ Nastia Liukin was denied—-denied—-the gold in uneven bars because of gymnastics math, leaving Elfi Schlegel and Tim Daggett apoplectic. Better luck in four years, Nastia, when China’s golden pixie, He Kexin, will no longer be 14.

Over at Endless Simmer, we can all breathe a sigh of… crostini. Dr. Matt passed his Ph.D. proposal exam, thanks in no small part to all the power snacks with which he plied the reveiw committee. Phew!

Who needs PoP and his lawn art? We can get all our Petworth news from Petworth News. PN has been mining the listserv and dug up this tasty bit about a pushy rep from Pinnacle Security.

He continued to disrespect me and insult me, going so far as to call me a “horrible mother,” “a basketcase,” and “crazy.” I ordered him off my property, at which point he taunted me and told me, “Go ahead and call the police.” …The sales rep headed down the street, then turned back around and approached the house again, this time telling me I was lucky I was a lady, or…

We’ll leave you to fill in the rest.

(photo from Mr T. in DC’s photostream, swallowtail at Dumbarton Oaks.)