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Hey! Check it out: Today is National Punctuation Day, a day that’s scientifically proven to be the most-ignored non-holiday among the nation’s blog commenters! What’s the rationale for the holiday (which isn’t really a holiday [I mean, there’s no card for it, and nobody gets a day off])? Glad you asked; according to the official Web site for the day, its makers intend to show that the “semicolon is not a surgical procedure.” Ha-ha!

How to celebrate? Well, if you look at the official Web site for the day, you learn right up top that you can make a deeply unappetizing-looking meat loaf (there’s a PDF page with a recipe, with an even worse photo); you can write an awful rap song; you can write a dutifully written essay. (Not to be confused with this, a dutifully written blog post. [You could say I dashed it off. (Ha-ha!)]) Or you could watch a moderately funny YouTube sketch: