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Does anyone really think dressing up as a taco or a banana or a PEZ dispenser is a good idea for a Halloween costume? Halloween is all about creativity—and free candy. C’mon, folks. Use your imagination. Going as a piece of meat is just a bad idea on all fronts. Going as a walking product placement for McDonald’s or Wonder Bread without remuneration is even dumber. (Yes, I say that even though I’m wearing an Adidas hoodie as I type; but I’m not wandering from house to house either.)

If any of your kids want to go as a food product, veto that idea with extreme prejudice. Help them make their own costume instead—-maybe go as gestation crate pig. At least they’ll be making a bigger statement than that they support a faceless multi-national corporation.