* Wonkette live-blogged Barack Obama‘s television infomercial last night on “poverty and murder.” All you need to know:

8:22 — Nevermind, the mother wasn’t the fourth Poor in his story. It’s Joe Biden.
8:22 — No — it’s Claire McCaskill.
8:22 — No — It’s Barack Obama. He is the fourth Poor in his own story.
8:23 — No, REALLY, It’s some guy named Mark, Louisville, lost job at factory, unemployment lines, can’t afford shit, THIS IS MOVING SO FAST, he wants to– THE END OBAMA SHOOTS A THREE POINTER.

* Playgirl editor forces Jezebel editor to consider Barack Obama‘s penis.

* The New Gay takes 9:30 club patrons to task for dancing, homophobia, tallness.

* John Dickerson for Slate: Why is the McCain camp so happy?

* GWU blog The Colonialist finds something fishy within the new McCain attack ad.

* And in this newspaper:

– The Battle For the Mid-Atlantic:CP chronicles the last legs of the local campaign. Justin Moyer takes McCain; Franklin Schneider takes Obama.

– Which D.C. Pharmacies won’t stock your contraception.

– Loose Lips tells you to write-in for Carol Schwartz. Bring a pencil.

– And in arts: Maura Judkis on Richard Avadon; Aaron Leitko reviews Gang Gang Dance.

Photo of the 9:30 Club by rpongsaj.