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A PSA for the ball enthusiasts among you: The redoubtable Amanda Hess and I will be filing dispatches this evening from the Kentucky Society of Washington’s 2009 Bluegrass Ball.

The to-do, whose slated guests include U.S Senators Mitch McConnell and Jim Bunning as well as former three-time Heavyweight Champion of the World Muhammad Ali, goes down at the elegant Marriott Wardman Park Hotel.

Honi Goldman, who runs media relations for the event, touts the “Walk Along the Kentucky Bourbon Trail” and an impressive-but-still-very-much-undisclosed list of “celebrity guests” as highlights of the evening. 1,400 persons are expected to attend.

And the food, you ask? Its sheer tonnage is remarkable:

This year’s guest chef is Chef Michael Paley of Proof on Main in Louisville who has created a Kentucky friendly menu. Most of the items on the evening’s menu will be shipped up from Kentucky including 350 pounds of Kentucky bison tenderloin, 350 pounds of strip bass and 720 heads of Bibb lettuce. Be ready to have your senses delighted….

Here’s the catch: Media types are permitted on the mezzanine level during the reception only, after which we’re supposed to retire to the “balcony area,” where potential celeb interviewees will be brought to us, mountain to Muhammad-style. (Ouch!) This also means limited access to the aforementioned 720 heads of lettuce and 700 pounds of fish & American buffalo (though it will afford us an exquisite view of any potential homoerotic behavior on the part of Senator McConnell).

Our plan is to decimate the bison and make it onto the floor for a couple subversive dances. Bonus points if we get decked by Cassius Clay.

Tune in for bulletins on our modestly envelope-pushing exploits.

UPDATE: 1/20/09 ~1:38 p.m. Head on over to The Sexist for Amanda’s compendium of practical wisdom gleaned from this event. Bison: check! Bibb lettuce: check! Mitch McConnell: er, check please!