Get our free newsletter

I had a fabulously odd meeting with Gary Clark over the weekend. The former Washington Redskins great wanted to talk about a column I wrote about an all-day tailgate party and gala that he had announced would be held at RFK Stadium on August 29. The soiree was named, among other things, the “Ultimate Tailgate Party and Tribute to Joe Gibbs and his Gridiron Warriors,” and was hailed by organizers alongside ticket solicitations as “the greatest sports event ever held in the Capital City of Washington, DC.”

My story was called “The Greatest Redskins Party You’ll Never Go To.”

Clark didn’t like the story.

During our meeting, Clark told me, “You’re on crack!” several times. He kept taking off one of his gigantasaurus Super Bowl rings and waving it in the air or putting it on the table in front of me.

He asked me whether I “ever even played the game.” (As if he didn’t know about my career ending with that 3-7 campaign of the Falls Church Jaguars during my senior season 30 years ago.) He told me I wouldn’t have written the story like I did if I knew my Redskins history.

“Do you even know who Clarence Vaughn is?” Clark asked.

“Safety,” I said, like I knew what I was talking about.

“No! Cornerback!” Clark said. (Wikipedia says safety, Gary! Why’d you do me like that?)

Clark asked for a retraction of everything I’d written, but didn’t come up with anything about the story as we went over it during the meeting to back up his request. He said he would be emailing me soon with more info about the event and how the scheduling went down, and I told him I’d write about that when he sent it.

The best news: Clark, who was one of the toughest Redskins of all time and looks like he could still play the game, didn’t ground and pound me into a pulp at any point during our meeting.

He did, however, tell me twice that I’d be in physical danger if “my linebackers” ever found out the way that my story mentioned Mel Kaufman, a former Skins linebacker who died last year but whose name was on the party invitation.

Oh, and he said the all-day tailgate party and gala is definitely back on. Only now it’s scheduled for December 29. That’s a Tuesday.

Cheap Seats Daily will stay up with all developments in Clark’s shindig.