Real Talk With Andrew Beaujon: What is weighing on you most heavily this morning: The death of Claude Lévi-Strauss…or the impending release of DROID?

If you picked DROID, keep reading! Lévi-Strauss said writing was the difference between the so-called civilized and the so-called savage; DROID says the difference between it and the iPhone is better coverage! ADVANTAGE: DROID!

Lévi-Strauss believed in “laws of mythical thinking”; DROID believes in making Garmin stock worthless! ADVANTAGE: TIE

Lévi-Strauss examined culture through food, but his theories were hostage to the fashion of academe; DROID is pretty great at everything except letting you end phone calls. ADVANTAGE: LEVI-STRAUSS.

POP QUIZ! Two of these are headlines or subheads in today’s print edition of the Washington Post, and one is something my grandmother used to say when conversation got incredibly boring.

1) “We happily let technology run the day, until it stops us in our tracks” 2) “Guardians of the roads or highway robbers?” 3) “Sure, you can get your money back, but there are no refunds on high expectations” ANSWER: Trick question! They’re all from today’s Post!

BIKE COMMUTING CORNER I am still wearing shorts when I ride to work. But much like I wonder where Northwest ends and Northeast begins when I look at North Capitol Street, I wonder where stubborness ends and being an asshole begins when Wearing Shorts in the Cold (WSITC). You need only walk through Adams Morgan at any time of day or night to feel the rage WSITC can inspire in even an even-tempered observer. Or fly! One of Beaujon’s Immutable Laws of Travel (BILOT) is that wherever you are going, there’s always someone in shorts on your plane. And yet here I am still bare-legging it to work! Please help me decide what is right. Also: I don’t have proper bike pants. Problem?

IN OTHER NEWS: Does Yankee fan elation bother you more than Phillies fan sadness pleases you? DISCUSS. Sad day for Spaniards: Francisco Ayala dies…at 103! Eat more ham! EWWWW: you’ve got the cutest little baby face. Also: Washington Times readers on global warming!

I gotta bounce! Follow me on Twitter! Advantage: DROID!