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Death Ray: Fairfax, Va., cops announced this month that they’d arrested a man for pointing a laser at a police helicopter. The lasering allegedly took place on Feb. 12, as helicopter and crew scoured the area of Newington Forest Avenue and Winding Way for the suspect of an unrelated crime. Raymond Jeffrey Poli (pictured), 47, is suspected of having aimed a green laser light and also a flashlight at the airborne cops, obscuring their vision and messing with their equipment. Poli, who was arrested on March 4, is charged with obstruction of justice and interfering with the operation of an aircraft and endangering life.

Cops say that using a laser pointer is far from innocent teasing: “Interfering with the operation of an aircraft and endangering life is a Class 6 Felony and is punishable by at least one year up to five years in jail, or at the discretion of a judge or jury, not more than 12 months in jail and/or a $2500 fine.” Oops.

Still Single: An MPD listserv poster is outing a market she suspects of serving up hooch 1987-style. Susan says the place is illegally peddling individual bottles of malt liquor, even though that’s banned in Ward 6 unless you have special permission from an advisory neighborhood commission. Susan writes:

“Dear officers, I hope you can help us to insure that the Eastern Thrifty Market at 1620 A ST SE does not sell single beers. It is not licensed to do so, but I observed yesterday that it was displaying 40 ounce beers for sale and also had a case of 40 ouncers visible. There have been numerous complaints on this Yahoo Group about this store, its ongoing loitering and trash and probably sale of alcohol to underaged teenagers.”

First District Commander David Kamperin responds: “We’ll work with ABRA [Alcoholic Beverage Registration Administration] on this.”

Suckerpunch: Two bouncers working at a hangout  in the 1200 block of Connecticut Avenue had a bad night: On March 19, at around 11:45 p.m., they got whomped. “The victims reported that while working the door at an establishment, they refused entry to the suspect,” police say. “The suspect punched both employees in the face and fled the area.”

Puppynapping : On March 20 at about 2.p.m., the 13-year-old was walking his dog—named Yeti—when two boys snatched the canine and ran, Montgomery County police say. But a day later, the kid caught a break: An “anonymous citizen from Montgomery Village called the Montgomery County non-emergency line to report that he had found the puppy on his porch. He had seen the story about the stolen dog on the TV news last night.” Cops returned Yeti to his owner.

Source: MPD District listservs and public releases, Fairfax  County Police Department ,  Montgomery County Police Department

Photo courtesy of Fairfax Police Department