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Good morning, City Desk, and welcome to the day you have all been waiting for. Friday, I mean!

Did you get fooled yesterday? Jason Cherkis did. His brother texted him that Brian Wilson had died, and Cherkis was actually so distressed he all but hung up on the person he was interviewing, and then started sobbing uncontrollably in the newsroom. All of that is true, except for the sobbing part.

Maybe-Possibly Mayor Vincent Gray has a few things he’d like to discuss with Michelle Rhee, if, you know, he were to win that office. Among them, according to the Washington Post: “burn out” and her fiance. Her fiance being Kevin Johnson, the mayor of a city that is nowhere near Washington, D.C. That city being Sacramento.

“She’s apparently getting married later this year,” Gray said. “Her spouse obviously can’t move here. So the question that would be germane to me is, does she want to commute 3,000 miles in order to be with her spouse? People get burned out in these jobs. I was a department director for four years at [the D.C. Department of Human Services], and after four years you burn out. It’s good to go do something else at that stage. So that would be all part of the conversation.”

First of all, that is a total exaggeration. I just checked Google Maps, and Sacramento is only 2,740 miles from the District, and it takes only 1 day and 19 hours to drive there straight, plus there are these things called airplanes. So it wouldn’t really be a problem for the chancellor of DCPS to do that cross-country commute every other weekend or whatever. Schools are out on the weekend! Plus, I mean, Kevin Johnson could run Sacramento from here from time to time, too. What’s the big deal? Mr. Mayoral Hopeful obviously hasn’t thought this issue through very well.

As for the burnout, Braveheart knows no burnout.

Gilbert Arenas has paid $5,000 into the D.C. crime victims fund as part of his court-ordered sentence for his very funny gun play. According to the Los Angeles Times, the basketball player’s $16.2-million salary makes him worth $197,500 per game. Or: $49,375 per quarter. Or: $4,114 per minute, even if he doesn’t play all 48 minutes, which he doesn’t.

So, basically, Arenas is paying into the victims crime fund what he earns in less than a minute and a half.

That seems about right to me.

Have a Friday!