Hang On, Mr. Gunman, I Have To Take This Call: On April 22, a man was being robbed at gun point in the 14400 block of Lake Winds Way, North Potomac, Md., around 11:00 a.m, when he came up with a plan: The victim told his assailants he was going to go make a phone call in order to score some cash. The muggers let him. But instead of calling a rich friend, the victim called Montgomery County police, who showed up and arrested the suspects.

The Suspect Was Wearing Nada: On April 26, a woman walking in the 11400 block of Gainsborough Road in Potomac “noticed a dark blue pickup pull up and park across the street. The suspect stepped out of the vehicle, not wearing any clothing,” according to Montgomery County police, who are handling the bare-bones investigation.

A Kinder, Gentler Southeast D.C.: 911 calls alerting police of two loud bangs heard at around 10:30 pm on May 8 in the 100 block of 5th Street SE brought three D.C. police units rushing to the scene to investigate. As it turns out, the responsible culprits were wearing baseball uniforms. The Washington Nationals were whooping it up with a post-game fireworks show: “It was determined that the Nationals had and will have a Fire Work Show every Friday night win or lose,” writes Lt. Diane B. Durbin on a police listserv, “If the games go into extra innings pass 11:00 P.M. they will not have the Fire Work Show so that they will not disturb the residents.’

Next Time, Come Pick Up Your Own Groceries: On May 8, a delivery man from Goody’s Carryout at 3925 14th Street NW found himself in trouble when he tried to drop off grub in the 900 block of Madison Street NW. Entering a building, he was set upon by two armed robbers who took his money, car keys, and food. One of the suspects drove off in the victim’s vehicle and the other fled on foot, police say.

Not What I Meant By Dine and Dash: On May 7, a woman was dining at a restaurant in the 2600 block of Connecticut Avenue NW at about  9:35 p.m. when three suspects came in, ran up to her table, and yanked her iPhone off of it. The suspects escaped, according to police.