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By PETA, our city was crowned
The best place for veggies around
Falafel’s delish
But sometimes I wish
That something more bold could be found

Of hope, it seems we have a glimmer
The District weighs in a bit slimmer
So go for it, fatties
Eat bacon-topped patties
But broccoli might keep you trimmer

For ages the District has waited
And these dudes may soon be instated
But Brady is noting
That statues and voting
Are not even slightly related

For those of the scofflaw persuasion
Fuggedabout past tax evasion
You criminals, hardened
Will briefly be pardoned
To bolster the budget equation