Legislators As Landlords: Congress used to content itself with passing laws to dictate what the District government could or couldn’t spend its locally raised money on. Now, apparently, that’s not enough. Iowa Republican Sen. Chuck Grassley says D.C. officials need to do something about the fact that the only licensed gun dealer in the city has lost his lease—meaning it’s impossible to get new handguns here. We suggest Grassley let the dealer, Charles Sykes, operate out of his suite in the Hart Senate Office Building if he feels so strongly about it. -2

Trumped: What better way to show how cool and edgy your newspaper is than to invite a rich buffoon whose attacks on President Barack Obama‘s citizenship and academic credentials verge ever closer every day to unreconstructed racism? Such is the strategy apparently guiding The Washington Post, which will proudly bring Donald Trump to the White House Correspondents Dinner tomorrow night—making Dana Milbank, of all people, look like the sanest person on the paper’s staff. -2

Royal Wedding Tie-Ins: The big wedding-related news of the day occurred bright and early and in London, where the newly minted Duke of Cambridge, Prince William, married the newly minted duchess, Kate Middleton. (We thought one of his other new titles, Baron Carrickfergus, sounded significantly cooler.) That didn’t stop marketers in D.C. from getting in on the action. Filene’s Basement held another installment of its “Running of the Brides” at its Mazza Gallerie location, drawing crowds from the presumably small Venn diagram intersection of “people who are a little obsessed with weddings” and “people who weren’t watching the royal wedding at 8 a.m.” +1

Rock the Red: There’s something anti-climactic about defeating the New York Rangers and moving on to face the Tampa Bay Lightning. For one, no one’s ever moved from D.C. to Tampa and announced that the city in Florida was hipper. For another, why do they even play hockey in Florida? Yet the Washington Capitals begin their best-of-seven series with their Southeast Division rivals tonight at the Verizon Center. So the hated rivals, at least until we send them packing, will have to be Tampa. And watch out, St. Petersburg—we’re looking at you, too. +2

Yesterday’s Needle rating: 62 Today’s score: -1 Friday bonus: +2 Today’s Needle rating: 63