This poem by one Blair Rieley (the author e-mails us to say it’s  a nom de plume) wonders about the state of the Smithsonian National Zoo and why, exactly there’s only one emu. Rieley—whose favorite bird is actually the pelican—tells us: “Darwin is by far the most entertaining animal at the zoo. He struts along the perimeter of his pen all day long.  Tons of people take photos of him with their kids in the foreground. He is a treasure. His personality more than makes up for his looks.”

The poetry manages to turn a complaint about emus into some grumbling about the way the zoo is run. Rieley says, “There is no reason that the Zoo should have to continually raise money from private citizens. Ag and tech schools should be affiliated with it. Administrators should watch the budget, use best practices and be creative in redeveloping a sense of place and the best family attraction in Washington, D.C.”

While we don’t endorse everything in the poem, we’re running it in full, because honestly, we don’t often get poetry in our inboxes:

Why Is There Only One Emu At The Zoo?

The animals from Australia can show the world a thing or two, After all, Australia is home to the kangaroo and flightless birds such as the emu.

Australia’s best are barely featured at the Smithsonian’s National Zoo. How, you ask, could this be true?

Darwin’s pen sits prominently atop the hill. The friendly emu is always happy to greet and show off his massive clawed feet.

Visitors, groundskeepers or volunteers, Darwin can sense when they are near.

He struts regally like a king or general His only company is a single marsupial. Darwin’s show has lots of flourish His pen mate, the wallaby, he does out shine. Far down the path, the antipodean Kiwi hides in the dark, The cassowary is in solitary near other big birds, But for all his show, why is Darwin the only emu that remains at the zoo? 

Mine is far from a guess or suspicion I’ve heard it more than once, As entertaining and beloved as Darwin is He is occupying expensive real estate And there is a plan afoot to replace him with a bigger draw An ostrich and a pig, I hear.

Isn’t there something that Australians can do? After all, Darwin is their capital An emu is on their country’s crest.

It seems his compatriots and fans Could celebrate his moral courage and pleasant demeanor By giving him what he really desires A filly so that he may be a sire. Add another wallaby or two, If possible include a family of kangaroo. Dress the place up with fence posts of didgeridoo. Come on Mate, it would be great!

Raise the bar.  Take the lead. Show the world that Aussie pride Forge relationships, bridge gaps, promote good things with good news Think of what you would do if you were in Darwin’s shoes.

While we’re at it, let’s assess financial conditions at the zoo.

Everyone can plainly see Animals are far outnumbered by employees. Contractors abound. Siemens’ contract is a sham Forrester’s pachyderm extravaganza must be over budget and delayed. While animals are eating GMO pellets Workmen are swinging golden mallets. A monkey’s forensic audit Would have caught it!

Photo by NCinDC via Flickr/Creative Commons Attribution Generic 2.0 License