Pop-ups are over! Or so you might think upon learning that Washington’s field of temporary pop-up shops will soon include a company that sells bandages and pain pills.

Help, a company that sells packaged tins with medical supplies (Help I Have Chest Congestion!) will run a pop-up at 522 10th St. NW, across from Ford’s Theatre, for four weeks starting on Nov. 1.

“The shop will feature ‘live windows’ related to the remedies and it will also serve as the location for several whacky events taking place throughout the four weeks,” reads a press release from the company. There will also be a speakeasy, as per pop-up law.

The events sound like a good time, in that forced whimsy Penn Quarter way. There’ll be a fortune teller, and a life coach, and OKCupid profile consultations. And then there’s this:

Male and female models will be on location giving out lighthearted hugs and kisses to visiting patrons who have never been kissed…or that are lying and stealing some kisses.

Oho, what devilish fun.

Full list of events below:

Monday, October 29, 2012
help I need a job
Overview: Help Remedies has a solution for those individuals in need a job. Those who show up to the Help shop will have the chance to be employed by Help for the day. They will be asked to hand out samples of Help Remedies to the ailing public and get paid for their efforts.

Saturday, November 3, 2012
help I’ve never been kissed
Overview: We’ve all been there but now Help is here to save the day! Male and female models will be on location giving out lighthearted hugs and kisses to visiting patrons who have never been kissed…or that are lying and stealing some kisses.

Sunday, November 4, 2012
help I’m worried about the future
Overview: For those worried and unsure about what tomorrow holds for them, Help will have all the answers. A fortuneteller will be performing free readings in-store for those looking to get a peek into their future.

Saturday, November 10, 2012
help I am insecure
Overview: Sometimes people need an extra boost in gaining more confidence and Help is holding this event to provide just that. A life coach will be on location to offer support and advice to those feeling insecure. As for those who are insecure about their nails, we’ll also have a manicurist on hand (pun intended)

Sunday, November 11, 2012
help I want to save a life
Overview: Help will be partnering with the DKMS Bone Marrow Donor Center to host a bone marrow testing in-store for those who are interested in donating bone marrow. People tend to get the urge to help and Help is helping them feed that help urge…now that’s a lot of help!

Saturday, November 17, 2012
help I am lonely
Overview: We all get lonely sometimes but on November 17th Help doesn’t want anyone feeling down. Besides providing the public with some great company, visitors to the shop will also be able to receive free consolation for personal profiles on OkCupid and other online dating sites in the hopes that they will get a hot date.

Sunday, November 18, 2012
help I want to save a life
Overview: Help invites the public to come down to their shop for another great cause. In partnership with The Red Cross, Help will be hosting a blood drive in their store.

Saturday, November 24, 2012
help I am in an argument with my spouse
Overview: Finally the score will be settled on at least one of the arguments we have with our spouses. Inside the Help shop, a “relationship judge” will be stationed and after hearing both sides of an argument, the judge will make a verdict.