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Avian Anxiety: Biologists are resorting to fireworks and frozen vulture corpse displays in an attempt to scare the carrion birds away from Leesburg. +3

Cornball Network: ESPN isn’t renewing the contract of Rob Parker, the analyst who questioned whether Pigskins quarterback Robert Griffin III is authentically black or is just a “cornball brother.” But Parker says ESPN employees knew what he was going to say before the show taped and didn’t have a problem with it. -2

New New New New Republic: Now that the New Republic is in the money, it’s got a new logo. It’s definitely a step away from the last design, which had an Age of Exploration-theme, but the new logo’ll probably seem normal in a month, and what more can you ask of a new look? +1

Ovechkin Chic. The Capitals’ Alexander Ovechkin wore a Russian T-shirt today that reads, according to a translation, “Am I really the most attractive one here, again?” +1

Monday‘s Needle rating: 45 Today’s score: +3 Today’s Needle rating: 48