Fiddlesticks: Hey sinkhole, you could’ve been cool! We tried to roll with the big boys, but now Illinois and Florida are just laughing at us. -3

Anarchy: Staff at BlackSalt restaurant in Palisades are so sick of waiting for taxis to come and pick up patrons that they’re starting their own car service. Is this a perk or another depressing sign of our city’s unreliable cab infrastructure? -2

Pricey: Studios in Prince George’s County are going for a whopping $1,550. -3

The World Beneath: Maybe it’s just me, but Washingtonian‘s write-up of the Adams Morgan sinkhole is weirdly soothing. “Well, there are sinkholes and then there are sinkholes,” writes Carol Joynt. This is true. +2

Monday’s Needle rating: 80 Today’s score: -6 Today’s Needle rating: 74