A morning roundup of news, opinion, and links from Washington City Paper and around the District. Send tips and ideas to citydesk@washingtoncitypaper.com.

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Bernie Hammond just wanted to sell heroin to pay for his lung medication, but the intervention of the FBI and an alleged drug boss named Kenilworth Fats spoiled his plan. That’s this week’s WCP cover story, available for free today all over the city.

LEADING THE MORNING NEWS:

  • Pentagon drops more than a week of planned furlough days. [Post]
  • “Mustachioed man pistol-whips ball thrower” near Clarendon. [WTOP]
  • Gentrification’s moving so fast, the H Street Giant is bragging about its quail. Or is it? [Post]
  • D.C. school renovations plan now includes charters. [Post]
  • MetroAccess use down, saving Metro money. [Examiner]
  • Metro to stay open late for March Madness games. [Examiner]

RECENT CITY PAPER STORIES TO HELP YOU MAKE SENSE OF YOUR DAY:

Photo of the Day: Outside SCOTUS.

Teenage Dream: Despite controversies, fire chief Ken Ellerbe can’t get the axe from Mayor Vince Gray. Is it because they’ve known each other since Ellerbe was a teenager, or something else?

Great Minds: Doughnuts and fried chicken is Washington’s latest restaurant trend, raising the question: What makes niche D.C. restaurants pop up at the same time?

That’s A Lotta Pop: An oral history of the “legendary” Lotsa Pop Losers festival.

LOOSE LIPS, by Loose Lips columnist Alan Suderman. (tips? lips@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • Pat Mara wins Sierra Club endorsement, says report that he lobbied for Exxon Mobil is a lie. [WAMU]
  • Urbanists, progressives, reformers unite for Elissa Silverman, says GGW. [GGW]
  • City picks three Medicaid MCOs, and Jeff Thompson doesn’t own any of them. [Post]
  • Few specifics in mayor’s new school construction plan. [Post]
  • Big hearing today for the fire department. [Fox5]
  • Anti-school closing advocates keep up the fight. [Informer]
  • Georgetown University: crowded. [WBJ]
  • No criminal punishments for parents in amended truancy bill. [Post]

HOUSING COMPLEX, by Aaron Wiener (tips? awiener@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • D.C. is the least affordable housing market in America. [WBJ]
  • And it’s the eighth-densest city. [GGW]
  • A group has put solar panels on one of every 10 Mt. Pleasant homes. [Grist]
  • A scintillating tale of drug dealers and the FBI in the District. [WCP]
  • Investors aren’t dominating the housing recovery. [NYT]
  • Here’s the story of one investor in Anacostia. [UrbanTurf]
  • There are two things wrong with calling this “job training.” [Loose Lips]
  • Live transit alerts come to Google Maps. [UrbanTurf]
  • Rep. Louie Gohmert will not tolerate this war on cars. [Politico]
  • Today on the market: Wisconsin Ave. condo

ARTS LINKS, by Ally Schweitzer (tips? artsdesk@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • Kennedy Center President Michael Kaiser is getting married to a nice guy he met at the gym. Adorbs! [Post]
  • Following problems with the registration process, the 2013 Small Press Expo adds more tables—and now it might be the biggest SPX in history. [SPX via ComicsDC]
  • (Former) D.C. band Tennis System wants your donations. [Tennis System]
  • “Pump Me Up” curator Roger Gastman guests on Mike Paarlberg‘s Radio CPR show. [Dissonance]
  • The standing ovation is so overused, it’s lost meaning. [Gwydion Suilebhan]
  • Beer : metal :: peanut butter : jelly. [D.C. Heavy Metal]

FOOD LINKS, by Jessica Sidman (tips? hungry@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • Cherry Blossom Festival drink specials [Drink DC]
  • Burger and spiked shakes pop up at Trummer’s on Main. [Washingtonian]
  • Where not to eat and drink on a Monday night [Eater]
  • Mayfair & Pine closes for good. [Post]
  • Tex-Mex restaurant coming to 14th and V streets NW will be called Diego. [WBJ]
  • Vinoteca opens its back patio with a grill. [PoPville]
  • Nine bars with games around D.C. [Zagat]