Aqualumbia: What would Washington look like if global warming melted the ice caps? Not great. -2

Metal Meddling: Like a pair of jonesing meth heads, the District and Verizon are fighting over copper wire. -1

Not Leaving on a Jet Plane: A judge has denied former D.C. Council Chairman Kwame Brown‘s request to leave D.C. to see his nephew graduate. +/-0

White Whine: Oasis Winery, once home base for White House party crashers and Northern Virginia fameballs Tareq and Michaele Salahi, is going to be sold at a foreclosure auction. -1

Tuesday’s Needle rating: 77 Today’s score: -4 Today’s Needle rating: 73