Dognapping: An 18-year-old District man was sentenced to four years in prison today for attempting to steal a Yorkie at gunpoint, according to a press release from the U.S. Attorney’s Office. “Give me your dog,” Christopher Young told the dog’s owner as he pointed a gun at her. “Yorkies cost a lot of money.” The dog soon escaped from Young and returned home, while the would-be dog thief was apprehended thanks to a GPS tracker on his ankle. +1

Escalator Mishap: People shouldn’t slide down Metro escalators, nor should they try to run up a “down” escalator. Alas, a Metro spokeswoman tells City Desk, one “apparently intoxicated” female passenger at Federal Triangle didn’t heed that advice. While trying to scale the escalator, the unwise passenger fell and injured her face. -1

For The Birds: A bird is stuck in the Columbia Heights DSW and Animal Control reportedly isn’t helping. -1

Cicadas: Are weird. -4

Friday’s Needle rating: 46 Today’s score: -5 Today’s Needle rating: 41