Bad Humor: Someone found a dead squirrel in Petworth holding an empty bottle of vodka and wearing a hat. Respect the dead, even rodents! -3

Two Party Fun: David Catania, an independent who says he’s more Democratic than the Democrats, officially launched his campaign for mayor. That guarantees even more political fun after the crowded April 1 Democratic primary. +4

Hops Run: The Nationals expect to increase the amount of craft beer sold at the stadium’s District Draft carts by 50 percent. That means they’ll have at least 60 kegs per home stand this year. Party on, Nats fans, party on. +3

Tragedy of the Wealthy:Capella Hotel’s $3,500 wine dinner was postponed indefinitely as the restaurant rethinks the idea of the wine dinner, which includes a tasting of an approximately $17,857 bottle of 2005 La Romanee-Conti. This will not be a positive or negative until we learn the ultimate fate of the wine dinner. +/- 0

Yesterday’s Needle rating: 53 Today’s score: +4Today’s Needle rating: 57