DC Cool, in Theory: Forbes anointed D.C. the coolest city in America. Being named “cool” in an arbitrary list by a business magazine is bad enough, but the ranking also opened the flood gates to equally inane reaction pieces and a wave of faux-self-deprecating tweets. Better luck next year, D.C. -6

DC Cool, in Practice: A D.C. man asks if it’s acceptable to wear his full-on bike jersey en route to a date. -3

Badge of Honor: There’s now a $15 shirt for cyclists who have fallen victim to the H Street NE streetcar track. This shirt may be arriving a little too late in the game, given the reported imminent arrival of the streetcar, but this shirt is likely relevant to more people than are willing to admit it. +3

Dog Days Are Over: The highly photographed Adams Morgan dog who is often spotted perched with his paws over his home’s window sill is moving to Arlington. -2

Yesterday’s Needle rating: 50 Today’s score: -8 Today’s Needle rating: 42