City Paper is not for tourists
As of Feb. 26, pot is legal in the District, with a few caveats. House Republicans sent a threatening letter to the mayor’s office Tuesday, but the city is moving forward with the law anyway. We’re declaring Thursday a weed holiday, so here are our dos and don’ts for celebrating.
- Why possess it when you can own it? Adults 21 and over are allowed up to two ounces. Fashion yours into a trendy floral crown, then go bid “good day” to a police officer. Someone will definitely try to steal the weed off your head, however.
- Get really high! You can only consume it legally in a home, but tell everyone you’ve ever met what you’re doing, then tweet an “I’m so high” selfie to MPD Chief Cathy Lanier.
- Get really high with your friends! If every party guest brings their two ounces, you can probably stay baked for about a week.
- Say thanks. Your local elected officials are standing up to Congress to enact a controversial law. Now that you can legally give (not sell) another adult up to one ounce, fruit baskets seem passe.
- Start growing your plants. ComfyTree (a marijuana education company) offers a year of support for home growers, so if you get stuck growing your three mature or six immature plants, there’s help.
- Put down the pipe and get back to advocacy. Initiative 71 doesn’t have any rules about taxing or regulating pot, so advocates are working on that now.
- Get cracking on your business plan. Entrepreneurs will want to be ready before the city tackles tax and regulate legislation. Step one: “It’s like [Uber/Snapchat/Tinder/other] but for weed!” Step two: Profit!
- Smoke in public or drive while high. Still illegal.
- Take your weed on a romantic picnic, just the two of you. No marijuana on federal property, which includes lots of D.C. parks and public spaces.
- Possess it in public housing. D.C. police won’t arrest you, but they’re required to report drug use in public housing facilities to federal authorities.
- Annoy your landlord. If your rented residence is non-smoking, use a vaporizer, or bake some brownies.
- Be a bad parent. Adam Eidinger, chairman of the D.C. Cannabis Campaign, said it best: “If you’re in the same room as your kids, you shouldn’t be smoking pot with them. It’s inconsiderate to them.”
- Be a minor. D.C. police will confiscate kids’ pot under two ounces and avoid arrests, but any more will get you in more trouble.
- Try to sell or buy it. When pot changes hands, you can pay with a hug, a handful of dirt, or the solemn promise that you’ll build your supplier a really, really great streetcar, but nothing of actual value can be exchanged in payment.
Photo by Darrow Montgomery