I met Chris Lombardi once. Back in ’07 I was helping some friends from Australia, who were then signed to Matador, the label he co-founded, get around the United States. When the tour came through New York City the label invited us to stop by the office for a visit. We dropped in for about half an hour—-about as long as we could afford to rent a parking spot in Manhattan—-shook hands, grabbed some CDs, and split.

Given the brevity of this encounter, I can’t claim to know much about the guy. However, were I to set up a Fake Michael Bay—style Twitter account for him based on first impressions and trivial details—he had a jar of formaldehyde on his desk with a coiled rattlesnake inside—-it would probably revolve around slurred words, fine dining, and pharmaceuticals.

In other worlds, it would be much like this actual Twitter account, which a friend passed along to me today. I guess this could be a hoax, but who else would brag about drinking a nice Côte de Beaune AND be Twitter friends with John Agnello? Seems pretty convincing.

Various 140 character slices of rock living after the jump:

i can’t sleep its 7 am, took a sleeping pill and shot. probably a bad move

-thats Mel Brooks btw MEL FUCKING BROOKS

-i guess i need rest after carousing till 530 am! Partners lunch someplace fancy then dinner at my club

-geez woke up early, just ordered a poppyseed bagel w/ sturgeon, belly lox creamcheese and onion + fresh OJ and a valium to take the edge off

-how can you spend SO much money in SO short a time?? well good eats I suppose, but the drink$$ I GUESS THE WINE WAS FINE!!!

after masala bloody’s off to PA’s for the lamb lotsa cotes de beaune

-Geez that was good bagel, Neue Gallery, leg o’ lamb lotsa old juice to drink at PA’s… prolly listen to some recent Hi-LIFE aquisitions

-just trying to figure out what makes everyonne OK