You never know when it might happen. A normal day at work turns into a hostage situation and after saving everyone in the building you have to walk away coolly as the kidnappers’ helicopter blows up in the background. You get caught in enemy territory and you have to rock the dynamite supply to evade your captors’ sadistic confinement. Or maybe you just lose your mind, decide to go all nihilistic, and set the town on fire. Whatever the situation may be, there is a time and place for walking calmly away from a massive pyrotechnic feat, and there are a few songs that beg to emphasize the drama of such an event.
When you want to kick it old-school and really drum up the insanity behind you while displaying a look of utter resolve, you might consider Vanilla Fudge. Its slowed-down cover of “You Keep Me Hanging On,” all psyched-out with organs and fuzz pedals, is nothing short of explosive. For the sociopath, this song is pretty heavy on the theatrics, which ought to compliment your menacing grin nicely.
If you’ve got a nice getaway car to slowly walk toward, give Chemical Brothers a shot. Their classic ’90s jam, “Block Rockin’ Beats,” will more than adequately suit a freshly polished Mazda MX-5 as you drive off with your just-rescued girlfriend and/or child. The big low end and repetitive vocal sample speaks so you don’t have to—just hold that unflinching gaze of detached confidence while the bad guys get their due.
For the most fashionably dressed walker, let D.C.’s Tabi Bonney soundtrack your triumphant escape. The track “Jet Setter” is both hard and restrained, which underscores your ironclad determination without detracting from your understated, classic apparel. This works for both the refined criminal and the renegade investigator who works on his own terms. When impressing the opposite sex is paramount, and the fireworks are at your back, “Jet Setter” is a solid choice. You can see Tabi Bonney’s own keen fashion sense along with some of the best hip-hop in the District at Rock & Roll Hotel Friday.