After spending a few weeks down south, I returned to D.C. reminded of how much this city constantly has to offer.  So after quite literally returning from the backwoods to write this weeks’ roundup, I felt like I was setting up booths at some high school multi-culti “We Are the World-inspired festival. Granted, not my high school or even yours, but I’m making the analogy anyway. Tonight, Mr. “Fuck You” himself  goes head to head with Das Racist, while Americana roots-rocker Justin Jones is at the 9:30 Club. You get the picture; if not, there are lots of visuals after the jump.

Whatever you choose, the weekend will look and probably feel a lot like this:

The Best of Friday:

Cee-Lo Green. American University’s Bender Arena. Call for more information. (202) 885-3267

Das Racist. Rock and Roll Hotel. SOLD OUT.

I may be woefully undereducated about rap music, but I’m not entirely sure whether I should trust a few Wesleyan-educated, Coogi-sweater-clad rappers to school me in what rap music looks like today. The post-colonial dream team Das Racist seems to know its stuff, and with hyper-referential, irreverent lyrics, it wants to make sure you do as well. From the group’s 2010 Sit Down, Man mixtape, the song “hahahaha jk?”  taunts, “we’re not joking, just joking, we are joking, just joking, we’re not joking.” It’s an apt summation of Das Racist’s mission to confuse, sanctify, maintain, and deliver.  Questioning if these guys are the real deal is likely, but they’re having an awful fun time playing at the fact that they might be. With Ardamus and the Metaphysical, Fat Tony.

The directions are simple: First bring canned goods and whole grain cereals to benefit the punk-rock collective Positive Force and the senior services nonprofit We Are Family. Then you benefit from punk, pop, and rock stylings of Pulling Teeth, Magrudergrind, Give, and Hot Mess. $8/$10.  St. Stephen’s Church. 6 p.m.

The Best of Saturday:

Socket Records Showcase: Hume. Skeletons. Buildings. Laughing Man. $12. 9 p.m. doors. Black Cat.

Last time around, faithful retro-soul crooner Eli “Paperboy” Reed squashed his competition, Mayer Hawthorne. He and his band brass-heavy boys, the True Loves, are back. With Spirit Kid and The Shifters. 8:30 doors. $14. Rock and Roll Hotel.

Urban Arias. $15. 7 p.m. & 9 p.m. Artisphere

The Best of Sunday: Prince vs. Prince: The 10 Year Anniversary. $10/$12. 9 p.m. Black Cat. Party like it’s actually 1985, before Prince disbanded the Revolution and the world was awash in the harmonies of Purple Rain, when Dynasty wouldn’t let Billy Dee Williams be great, and Quincy Jones produced super sessions that could change the world.

Funk 4 The Dream: Afrika Bambaataa. Asheru. Fort Knox Five. Jahsonic. Rex Riddem. Mustafa Akbar. $10. 9 p.m. show.U Street Music Hall.

The Rest of Friday:

Vocalist Akua Allrich. 9 p.m. and 11 p.m.  Friday and Saturday. Twins Jazz. Justin Jones and The Driving Rain. With Jason Isbell and The 400 Unit. $15. 8 p.m. doors. 9:30 Club. All Good Funk Alliance. Price set at door. 10 p.m. show. 18+. U Street Music Hall. Musicband. Thee Lexington Arrows. Yell Country. The Bam Bams. $8. Comet Ping Pong. Truth & Salvage Co. A Thousand Horses. Black Dog Prowl. $10. 9 p.m. show. Red Palace. 18+ The State Department. Vita Ruins. Loose Lips. $10. 9 p.m. show. Black Cat.Practically Einstein. With Zelos and Kindlewood. $10. 9 p.m. Iota Club. Quaman Fowler Quartet. $15/$20. 8:30 p.m. show. Friday and Saturday. Bohemian Caverns. V0calist Julie Nixon. 8:30 p.m. $34. Friday and Saturday. Artisphere.

The Rest of Saturday:

Virginia Coalition. With Danni Rosner, School of Rock DC. $15. 6 p.m. show. 9:30 Club. Chopteeth Big Afro Funk Band. 9: p.m. $15. Iota Club. Sleeper Agent Presents: Lo Fi Muay Thai Release Party. Ozker. Reemstar & Navi. $10. Comet Ping Pong. BSO: Icarus at the Edge of Time. $14 – $88. 8 p.m. Strathmore.

The Rest of Sunday:

Reaction 2011: Susan Morabito. Guy Smith. $35. 10 p.m. show. 9:30 Club. Eternal Summers. Maybe, Baby. Flourescent Scents. $8. 8:30 p.m. show. All ages. Red Palace.Jean-Paul Bourelly. $15. 7 p.m. show. Bohemian Caverns.