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Inside this week’s Washington City Paper you’ll find our valuable guide to self-improvement, detailing the city’s large multitude of specialized classes, from salsa classes to Djembe African drumming. Also, apparently we put a penis on the cover. Check back on Arts Desk later today for arts-and-culture-related highlights from the guide.

Benjamin R. Freed leads the arts section with his look at the culture of journo-bands—-that is, rock groups staffed by Beltway journalists that play uninspired cover tunes and can draw decent-sized crowds of their peers. In the theater pages, Chris Klimek reviews Studio’s Tynan and American Century Theater’s Beyond the Horizon, Bob Mondello reviews Arena Stage’s Arabian Nights, and Trey Graham reviews Shakespeare Theatre Company’s Cymbeline. Film critic Tricia Olszewski reviews The Rite, starring a very creepy (of course!) Anthony Hopkins. Ryan Little reviews the New Age jams on Phil Manley‘s Life Coach, and David Dunlap Jr. thinks about the weirdo pastiche-pop of Fergus & Geronimo.