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Lovers of comedy, contemporary art, and avant-garde underground music face a difficult decision this weekend: The annual Bentzen Ball(e)merge art fair, and Sonic Circuits experimental music festival all run concurrently this year. Which one is right for you? Consider the following data points.

You think the 1960s were the golden era of American hotel architecture.

You prefer art shows with a whiff of Ai Weiwei.

Your primary critique of the local art scene is that there’s not enough weird performance pieces.

You like standing near pools without getting wet.

You want to wear your new luxe crop top.

You should attend: (e)merge

You listen to a lot of podcasts.

You hated September, and you need a good laugh.

You’ve been dying for Tig Notaro to come to town.

You prefer comedy festivals with a whiff of minor line-up drama.

You want to wear the first thing you pull from your closet.

You should attend: Bentzen Ball

You love tonal beeps.

You prefer the sound of an orchestra warming up to the sound of an orchestra playing.

You know who Gen Ken Montgomery and Andrea, Enchantress of Bioluminosity are.

You feel like you don’t spend enough time in Silver Spring.

You want to wear your Acid Mothers Temple T-shirt.

You should attend: Sonic Circuits

Sonic Circuits is Oct. 3-5 at the Pyramid Atlantic Art Center, 8230 Georgia Avenue, Silver Spring; (e)merge art fair is Oct. 2-5 at the Capitol Skyline Hotel, 10 I Street SW; the Bentzen Ball is Oct. 1-5, various locations.