We know D.C. Get our free newsletter to stay in the know.
HO HO WHO: It’s a Death Metal Xmas is the one-man project of Tim Regan (Borderstan editor Tim Regan, is this you?). Ditching that whole “silent night” approach to Christmas, Regan regularly dishes out totally brutal renditions of holiday tunes. His It’s a Death Metal Thanksgiving EP, released last month, celebrates Jesus’ birthday and the season of giving with a little bit of the devil’s music.
HELL’S BELLS: Let’s face it, “Jingle Bells” is probably the worst Christmas song of all time. It’s repetitive, has nothing to do with presents, and extols the virtues of riding around in a sleigh like a total slacker. However, throw in some blast beats and death growls, and you’ve got an instant holiday classic for slam dancers everywhere. It’s a Death Metal Xmas doesn’t totally ditch everything that makes “Jingle Bells” what it is, though, as guitar and bass take a back seat to the titular jingling bells.
FAST AND FURIOUS: Perhaps the only problem with death metal covers of Christmas tunes is the fact that the gimmick often loses its charm fairly quickly. Recognizing this, Regan’s cover clocks in at just under two minutes, blowing your ears out, offering a chuckle, and moving on before your grumpy inner-grandpa decides this music is just too damn loud.
Cheer Factor: 8/10. Indisputable scientific fact: family gatherings and office holiday parties are significantly more fun if there’s a mosh pit involved.