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Stop right now: Do not put that chocolate-flavored body spread on your penis. Better leave it off your nipples, too.
According to a Reuters report this morning, British sex shops have discovered the industry chemical melamine in a line of Chinese-produced body products meant to be applied to the nipples and penis. Last month, melamine in milk was blamed for the illnesses of several thousand Chinese babies, including at least four fatalities.
“This is a first. We’ve never had to put out an alert before on ‘willy spread’ — chocolate-flavored or otherwise,” the British Food Standards Agency announced.
The spreads—-found in Chinese-produced “I Love You” packages sold in Britain’s Ann Summers sex shops—-also come in strawberry.
The EU requires that “products with more than 2.5 milligrams per kg must be withdrawn and destroyed”; the intimate body spreads were found to have melamine levels “from 126 milligrams per kg to 259 milligrams per kg.”
Still, serious illness from the products is unlikely, the FSA says; compared to an infant’s milk intake, ingestion levels of the sex product are relatively low.