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A friend (the one in the giant banana costume) has a great response for all the creepy and cringe-inducing pick-up lines women hear every day: Shame the pick-up artist. How You Doin? collects the worst of the worst, all in a handy tumblr. Some recent failures submitted by readers:

(I was twelve at the time)
Me: (eating a torpedo ice cream bar)
Grease ball in front of car garage: I wish I was that ice cream.
Me: (throws the ice cream at him)

—-

Guy at the bar: Do your feet hurt?
Me: No.
Guy at the bar: You ruined it! I’m smooth.

—-

Man wearing shirt and drinking an espresso martini: Hey, how’s it going?
Me:
(sarcastically) Good. What is that? An espresso martini? (I turn around to give the bartender my order)
Man SUDDENLY NOT WEARING SHIRT WITH EMPTY MARTINI GLASS: Bartender, can I have another?
(He had spilled all over his shirt, quickly removed it, and still continued to flirt with me like nothing had happened).

Photo by glennharper.