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ESPN is blowing up with coverage of a comment that Dallas Stars* player Sean Avery made about his ex-girlfriends this week (who include actress Elisha Cuthbert and model Rachel Hunter). Here’s the scenario:

Avery’s inflammatory line came following a morning skate in Calgary, Alberta. Reporters were waiting to speak with Avery about disparaging remarks he’d made last month about Flames star Jarome Iginla when Avery walked over to the group and asked if there was a camera present. When told there was, he said, “I’m just going to say one thing.”

“I’m really happy to be back in Calgary; I love Canada,” the Ontario native said. “I just want to comment on how it’s become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don’t know what that’s about, but enjoy the game tonight.” He then walked out of the locker room.

Avery was suspended indefinitely.

First of all: I love that Avery made this disparaging comment in lieu of commenting on another disparaging comment he had made in the past. That’s gusto. Second: Are you fucking kidding me? Is “sloppy seconds” really the phrase that’s going to end this guy’s career? Avery is considered “the most hated player” in a sport where dudes regularly punch each other in the face while coasting around on sharp metal implements, and “sloppy seconds” is the best he can come up with? Looks like Avery has a history of low-grade, totally wussy insults: he’s called announcer Bryan Hayword an “embarrassment” and branded another player a “fatso.”

Now that Avery’s suspended, maybe he should consider moving on to a sport that has less insufferable pansies, like second-grade four-square, or retirement home clowning.

* hockey