Giant stone erections fail to lift D.C. above the competition.

Combos brand snacks has released a study (stay with me here) ranking the 50 manliest cities in the United States. Washington, D.C. ranks a pathetic 45, proving manlier than only Chicago, Portland, San Francisco, Los Angeles, and New York.

The criteria for maniness appeared to be but a thinly veiled count of how mant Combos brand snacks each city consumes per capita:

Each metro area received a manliness rating between 0 and 100 based on how well it performed in each of the study’s manly categories. Factors used to determine the manliest city rankings included the number of U.S.-made cars driven in the city, number of sports bars and BBQ restaurants, number of home improvement and hardware stores as well as manly salty snacks consumption.

Here’s the full list of manliest cities. Coincidentally, it also appears to be a ranking of cities in which I most do not want to live.

1. Nashville, Tenn. 2. Charlotte, N.C. 3. Oklahoma City, Okla. 4. Cincinnati, Ohio 5. Denver, Colo. 6. St. Louis, Mo. 7. Columbus, Ohio 8. Kansas City, Mo. 9. Indianapolis, Ind. 10. Toledo, Ohio 11. Memphis, Tenn. 12. Richmond, Va. 13. Columbia, S.C. 14. Orlando, Fla. 15. Dayton, Ohio 16. Salt Lake City, Utah 17. Milwaukee, Wis. 18. Minneapolis, Minn. 19. Cleveland, Ohio 20. Detroit, Mich. 21. Jacksonville, Fla. 22. Phoenix, Ariz. 23. Birmingham, Ala. 24. Grand Rapids, Mich. 25. Tampa, Fla. 26. Harrisburg, Pa. 27. New Orleans, La. 28. Las Vegas, Nev. 29. Pittsburgh, Pa. 30. Philadelphia, Pa. 31. Louisville, Ky. 32. Atlanta, Ga. 33. Providence, R.I. 34. Dallas, Texas 35. Buffalo, N.Y. 36. Rochester, N.Y. 37. Baltimore, Md. 38. Boston, Mass. 39. Houston, Texas 40. Seattle, Wash. 41. Sacramento, Calif. 42. Miami, Fla. 43. San Diego, Calif. 44. Oakland, Calif. 45. Washington, District of Columbia 46. Chicago, Ill. 47. Portland, Ore. 48. San Francisco, Calif. 49. Los Angeles, Calif. 50. New York, N.Y.

Photo by kimberlyfaye