Oops. March 8th to the 14th was “DC Abstinence Awareness Week,” and most District residents probably unknowingly had sex through the whole thing. The Washington Aids International Teens (WAIT) group, “a performing arts group that emphasizes abstinence education through entertainment,” entertained; the Ultra Teen Choice group chose “Character, not Condoms.” For those who, instead, engaged in regularly scheduled sex, some deets:

In a city dominated by the safe sex doctrine, abstinence advocates receive seven guaranteed days annual during the second week of March to spread their message—-Abstinence Awareness Week.

The forum focused not only on disease prevention, but holistic living achieved through a sex-free lifestyle.

District resident Arnetta McKenzie brought her son, Jason Neely, to the youth forum.

“I’m here because I have a 12-year-old-son,” she said pointing to Jason, sitting next to her. “He needs to hear this.”

McKenzie hoped that the abstinent teenagers speaking and performing would serve as better role models for him than media personalities.

But the educational fun couldn’t last forever: One day after Abstinence Awareness Week concluded, the D.C. government released its report pegging the local AIDS rate at 3 percent.