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If the vibrating razor rubbed you the wrong way, perhaps this attempt to spice up the act of shaving your vagina will be more up your alley. Probably not, though, because it’s pretty racist. It also implicates the house cat in ways I’m not entirely comfortable with.

This ad for the “Wilkinson Sword Quattro for Women Bikini”—-a razor/trimmer duo—-turns pubic hair shaving into a rousing gardening ditty, complete with racially-informed stereotypes about female sexuality and cruelty to animals!

So, the black woman’s bush is big (wink), the Asian lady’s bush is small (tee-hee), and by the end, the pussycat (oh, the subtelty) is completely hairless. Women of all races and vaginal styles spend their time enthusiastically grooming a slutty suburban wonderland that recalls Stepford, but with shorter skirts. I think the thing to take away here is that no matter how hairy your vagina is (if you’re unsure, review the ethnic rubric above), just get rid of the damn thing, seriously. Also, make me a sandwich.

This ad comes recommended by the creepy dude who watched the whole thing over my shoulder while I was blogging about it in a coffee shop. He especially liked the pussy.