There’s still time to nominate local icons for Best of D.C.

We all know that the Sexy Halloween Costume industry has got a penchant for indulging in underage fantasy. The Sexy Schoolgirl Costume, of course, is a perennial favorite. But even when grown women dress up in knee-highs, pleated minis, and Britney-style button-downs, schoolgirl afficionados can still tell themselves that the style reflects a student in her late teens—-perhaps one graduating from high school, or recently enrolled in a Catholic girl’s college. In other words, she could be 18. Maaaaybe.

Not so with the “SEXY BROWNY BABE” COSTUME:

The “Sexy Brownie Babe” get-up is modeled after the youngest class of Girl Scouts. And there ain’t a lot of wiggle room in terms of age.

According to the Scouts, “Brownies” are girls enrolled in grades one to three, aged 6 to 8 years. Typical activities for Brownies include “learning to swim at summer camp,” “planning an overnight to celebrate their birthdays,” and “deciding how many cookies to sell to earn money for trips.”

Obviously, using the image of these young girls to help adults get their rocks off (retail price $74.00) is really fucking gross. But how do we know that the “Browny Babe” is truly a rip-off of our young Brownie Scouts? Take a look at the Brownie uniform:


They got the colors (brown and baby blue) just right. They even threw in the accessories:

The “Sexy Browny” version only missed one little detail: Instead of merit badges, the sash boasts a smiley face and a button reading “69.” And I’m going to be hard pressed to find a Halloween costume grosser than that.