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Sometimes, Craigslist Missed Connections have the power to renew your faith in love-at-first sight. Other times, they will destroy your faith in humanity. This is one of those times.

I don’t know what possibly could have happened this week to inspire some of the saddest missed connections that I have ever seen, but it’s not my place to speculate—-Internet stalking works in mysterious ways.

First up: can two “sell outs” make it work?

BRUCE CONCERT AT VERIZON (Verizon Center)

You: Older Gentleman Jeans and Jacket in Section 429 at Springsteen concert Monday.

Me: 5 feet aisle seat. Dark skin brown hair Jeans, black T-shirt. I danced and sang along all night at show.

I questioned if show would be a sell out. You suggested it was a sell out. Sensed a connection. Would love to chat over coffee.

She wore a vest. He wore a lip sweater:

great mustache, no shirt – w4m – 24 (Columbia Heights)

You were riding your bike without a shirt. You have an amazing mustache and a sly smile. I was wearing a vest sitting at the wonderland. I hope we can connect.

He was having lunch at a Hooters in Manassas. OF COURSE he’s checking this to see if any of the girls at Hooters secretly wanted to fuck him!

lunch at Hooters – w4m – 27 (Manassas, VA)

hoping there’s a chance you check this . . . saw you having lunch with 2 other men at Hooters in Manassas today. Started to slip you my number, but missed the opportunity. The guy I was with is not my boyfriend. It would be nice to see you again

So, you’re cheating on your wife, and you’re cheap. Perfect.

ashley madison profile – m4w – 37 (Reston)

You winked at me on Ashley Madison web site , ID- “I_might_surprise_you”. I have a free account so I cannot reply.

And you met your astrologer at a strip club. In 1985. You know what? I think we’ve finally found a match that makes sense.

Brian Sullivan- ASTROLOGER- I am looking for him (Washington, DC) (CAMELOT – 1823 M ST — (Washington, DC ))

I am looking for —- Brain Sullivan ——— Professional ASTROLOGER — ( & English Teacher)

He lives in Washington, DC

He is 40+ — slim white male — with pale skin — & white hair.

He is a —- PROFESSIONAL ASTROLOGER

( & he also teaches English on the side)

I have lost contact with him and wish to see him.

He is my astrologer. i have known him since 1985

he knows me well

I wish to find him so I can set up a NEW astrology reading from him .

Photo by::PinkDiamonds::, Creative Commons Attribution License 2.0