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As hip-hop booty model memoirist Karrine Steffans can surely tell you, life ain’t easy for a video vixen. She’s oversexed, underpaid, and generally under-appreciated for her services: basically, “sprawling undressed over a luxury car while a rapper is saying lewd things about her.” That goes doubly true for the dozens of ladies featured in “Gangsta Love,” the latest video from Snoop Dogg and Dream. Video girls have always been tasked with fulfilling a rapper’s every command—-but these women are subjected to a particularly absurd laundry list of Snoop Dogg fantasies, from pretending he’s on True Blood to falling victim to a ladies’ shower hit-and-run. And when one woman can’t fulfill Snoop’s needs, he disposes of her—-sometimes, over the side of a speed boat. The trials and tribulations of Snoop Dogg’s fantasy women, after the jump.

Rollerskating in a Cadillac.

Being a vampire.

Drowning.

Getting run over by a car while showering.

Pretending to like the Steelers.

Spanking.

Feeding Snoop noodles.

Feeding Snoop more noodles.

Watching Snoop finish eating the noodles.

Keeping hold of your drink while on roller-coaster (no seat belt).

Hanging out with this guy.

More traditional video girl activities.