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Yes, “too fat for Playboy” actually constitutes a full episode’s arc on this show. This week’s episode of the Real World D.C. was the Very Special Body Image Edition. Essentially, everyone just commented on Callie’s body the whole time. She’s not skinny enough! She works out too much! Andrew secretly watches her shower! This issue looks like it might snowball into a season-wide theme; at a premiere party, one Real World fan told City Paper that Callie looks like she’s lost 20 pounds since filming.
In non-weight-related-issues: one cast member tells another cast member to suck his own dick. (Refresh yourself with the first and second episode sex recaps here). The top 10 sex-ish moments of the third episode, after the jump.
10. ANDREW LOOKS AT NAKED CHICKS IN THE SHOWER.
Andrew: “Girls think that the frosted glass on the shower, that you can’t really see through that. But you can. So.”
Josh: “I saw most of them already . . . Callie has a nice body, I love it, I love it.”
Andrew: “She’s got some meat on those bones . . . But you can never tell her that.”
Josh: “Some girls are self-conscious about that type of thing.”
9. TY AND EMILY HAD SEX
Afterward, Ty calls his ex-girlfriend to tell her about it, for some reason. She is upset by this.
Meanwhile, Ashley continues her parade of strange racial comments: “I’m picturing the future: Little black-white babies.”
8. ASHLEY DEEMS HERSELF A SIZE-2 “CURVY”
Discussion topic: Who do you think is going to gain the most weight in the house?
Ashley: “Me. I’m going to go from like a 2-4 to a 6-8.”
Callie: “That is not curvy. . . . I’ve never been a small, teeny tiny little girl. I’ve always wanted to be smaller.”
7. TY GETS JEALOUS OF EMILY DANCING WITH OTHER BLACK MEN.
Shouted from the steps of the Real World house: “Hey Emily, how were all the black guys at the bar? Were they fun? Were they awesome? Did you rub up against them with their [BLEEPED] out?”
6. TY CALLS CALLIE TOO FAT FOR PLAYBOY.
Callie: “Ty, I have the right hair color to be a Playboy bunny.”
Ty: “You’re not skinny enough.”
Callie (opening her heart to the confessional): “Ty makes a comment that I’m not skinny enough to do Playboy, and I’m trying really hard to act like it’s not bothering me, but it’s like marinating in the back of my head and even though i’m attempting not to get upset, I am.”
Ty explains himself: “To be perfectly honest, Callie is not the size of a playboy model. I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I’m a realist.”