We know D.C. Get our free newsletter to stay in the know.

[youtube:v=d-V_oalCtdQ]

It’s time for more Dr. Laura YouTube fun! This time, Dr. Laura Schlessinger answers the age-old question: Can (hetero) men and women be “just friends”?

Answer: Men and women can be friends as long as it’s a “cool quality, casual friendship fun thing where they both golf together, and that’s it,” Schlessinger explains.

But once these opposite-sex friends start having conversations that go beyond, say “Fore!,” it’s time to adopt an extreme concern for their ability to remain monogamous to their partners. Schlessinger explains the rules of hyper-monogamy: “Is this someone he tells the privacies of his life to? Ultimately, that would be his wife—-and if that worked out, it would be you,” Schlessinger says. “If a married woman is spending time with a guy, sharing intimacies about her life, that’s inappropriate.”

So: Talking to other people is considered cheating now. Let’s see how this moral position might play out in a typical marriage: “You have a life outside of this marriage? That’s cheating.” Or, “You told your friend that I cheated on you? That makes you a cheater.” Or, you know, “You told your friend that I accused you of cheating because you found out I cheated on you? I can’t believe you cheated on me again.”