* NOM’s hetero-happy summer bus tour will be shadowed by counter-events organized by Freedom to Marry. The marriage rights group will respectfully disagree with NOM’s “one man, one woman” message at every stop the NOM bus makes. Unfortunately, no actual gay bus will be stalking NOM’s anti-gay bus across the highways of this great nation.
* Fugitivus [via Figleaf] on rape victims who drop charges, refuse to participate with investigations, and decline to testify:
I am sure that in this wide, wide world of people, there are rape victims out there who truly want nothing more than for their rapists to go free without punishment, without retribution, without justice. That’s their right. But I don’t think I’ve actually heard any of them. Instead, what I hear is, “I just want this whole thing dropped. I don’t want it prosecuted. Every time this gets brought up I get harassed.” Or, “I don’t want this prosecuted. I don’t want to be called a slut in court.” Or, “I don’t want this prosecuted. I could never win, I don’t have the money, and nobody would believe me.” Or, “I don’t want this prosecuted. He would kill me. His friends would come after me.” Or, “I don’t want this prosecuted. I can’t stand to see him every day in court.”
None of those statements can be reasonably boiled down to, “Rape victim doesn’t want her rapist to come to justice.” They can be reasonably boiled down to, “Rape victim suspects pursuit of justice will feel worse than getting raped did.”
I think it can also take forms like these: “I don’t want this prosecuted. It’s not something to ruin another person’s life over.” Or: “I don’t want this prosecuted. He says it didn’t happen that way, and maybe it didn’t.” Or: “I don’t want this prosecuted. I’m not worth all of this attention.”
I don’t find myself to be the kind of person who is easily swayed. I could see what this guy was doing. But if I pose for Maxim, I know that if my nipple accidentally slips out, they can’t publish that. With Playboy it’s different. I understand that the criticism is: “Yeah, but she posed for it anyway.” Well, that’s like saying, “Oh, you were asking for it cause you dressed a certain way.”
* Georgetown Girl collects the views of women who say “I’m not a feminist, but . . .“
* Jamelle Bouie on “acting white”:
as a nerdy black kid who was accused of “acting white” on a fairly regular basis, I feel confident saying that the charge had everything to do with cultural capital, and little to do with academics. If you dressed like other black kids, had the same interests as other black kids, and lived in the same neighborhoods as the other black kids, then you were accepted into the tribe. If you didn’t, you weren’t. In my experience, the “acting white” charge was reserved for black kids, academically successful or otherwise, who didn’t fit in with the main crowd. In other words, this wasn’t some unique black pathology against academic achievement; it was your standard bullying and exclusion, but with a racial tinge.